Wednesday, November 18, 2009

What dreams may come.

Oh the dreams!

Last night was the most vivid two-line HPT dream I've ever had. Mr. LC and I were in a hotel for some reason (maybe because so much of this process has been spent in hotels) and I was taking a test. We decided it was defective because some little message popped up. So we took another one. Mr. LC looked at it and said "I think it's negative." Then I looked at it and saw that it was, in fact, quite positive and this Mr. LC was whacko. Then both tests were remarkably positive.

We whooped it up all over the hotel room.

Suddenly my Mom was coming (!) and I said "Mr. LC we have to hide these tests because I want to tell her at Thanksgiving!"

So I frantically grabbed them up and stuffed them in my purse for safekeeping.

Then I woke up.

Once again, for those milliseconds of time when dreams and reality are blurred I had a smug satisfaction in my heart that it had worked. Then I opened my eyes and adjusted to the fact that it was 5:30 AM and I had to get cracking but I let the happiness from that dream carry me into the shower and beyond.

I'm going to sleep every night listening to a hyponofertility CD that the gracious Phoebe gave to me. I definitely think I'm having more peaceful sleep, and I'm glad for that.

Yesterday the doc I work with who is going through IVF popped into my office and asked if we could all go to dinner this Saturday night.

Gulp.

Saturday night. The night before beta.

Likely we will test Saturday at some point. We can't be blindsided. They won't know until Monday and have decided not to take a home test. This being their first IVF, the fact that they had stellar fertilization rates, the fact that they had beautiful blasts to transfer, the fact that the only reason they're doing IVF is because she exercises so much she doesn't ovulate (seriously) means that it will work for them.

I told him that depending on our test results we may or may not be the best company.

Please please please let my dream from last night play out in real life (well, not the hotel part).

Kramer! Elaine! Jerry! George! One of you--make me a mother. Make Mr. LC a father.

Please.

15 comments:

  1. Please, please, please. I know it's stupid, but I always hated it when people were cycling so close to me - especially good prognosis patients - it felt like they were trying to take "my turn" even though it doesn't work that way.

    Sunday. So close and so far.

    Hoping your dreams come true.

    Up for walking??

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  2. I have goosebumps just reading your post! I SO SO SO want this to work for you!! Come on, Seinfeld Crew, GROW and STICK!!:)

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  3. I saw the title of your post and was thinking...isn't her beta, like, REALLY soon? And, reading your post put tears in my eyes because I know how awful this 2ww is and I have so much hope for you this cycle! I can't wait to see a really celebratory post in a few days. Hang in there.

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  4. You know I'm rooting for you!

    (I cringed when I read that bit about your friends. Exercises so much she doesn't ovulate - Seriously? Ugh.)

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  5. Kramer and Elaine are my bets...they seem the toughest.

    I hope your dream comes true! You deserve that moment and it would be so awesome to get to tell your mom on Thanksgiving!

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  6. Hoping that all your dreams (well only the good ones) come true! Waiting on pins and needles with you!

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  7. I wish I knew what little message popped up on your first dream pee-stick! Plus, wouldn't it be great if little messages DID pop up? Like fortune cookies?

    I hope you have great news for your mother at Thanksgiving!

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  8. dreams DO come true! (I know it sounds corny.)
    this will be the best thanksgiving ever! it has to be!
    I'm thinking elaine! :)

    exercising too much? ugh....

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  9. puh lease puh lease puh lease!!!!!!

    lisa from meinsideout

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  10. Oh, I have such vivid dreams too, I sometimes have a hard time separating them from reality for quite a while once I do wake up.
    I hope that you GET that dream on saturday, that you NEVER wake up from that happy-blissed-out feeling that it brings.
    I'm so nervous, excited, happy and anxious for you! Can't wait for this big moment for you...

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  11. I so hope for you that test day will be a good day for you...and don't buy any internet cheapies either! I'm glad you've found the hypnofertility CD helpful and I truly, truly wish that your dream becomes your reality this weekend. Fingers, toes, everything crossed for you.

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  12. I so want this for you. Blow off your work doc if it's not supportive. Wanting it all for you!! Dream big.

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  13. I can't help but continue to believe you're going to get the two lines this time and my only real question is . . . one baby or two?

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  14. Ugh. My eyes are still rolled back in my head. Moving on to something nicer...

    I am so nervous/excited for you guys I have caught myself holding my breath when I think about it! I think the worst part of the 2ww is the day before, that last moment, and then...poof!...may you see two lines! Two dark pink lines, that magic digital message, both, over and over.

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  15. hoping that your saturday is the best ever!!!!

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