Yeah, it's overwhelming, but what else can we do?
Get jobs in offices, and wake up for the morning commute?
Here here MGMT. It is overwhelming. And so what do I do? Wake up for the morning commute, I guess.
When I'm stressed out I tend to blast music very, very loudly in my car. That MGMT song was the last one playing and it's been in my head all day long...
The last few days have been fraught with anxiety over this cycle, I just wanted things to go easily, and then I remembered it was ME we're talking about, nothing ever goes easily.
Long story short: I spotted and bled on the endometrin. Who knew that would happen? We didn't know whether it was my period or just irritation, or just because of the biopsies. They finally took me off the endometrin on Friday midday and said to wait for a 'real period' but instead, having the body/uterus that I do, I bled a little more and then it started tapering off.
This afternoon I went and had an ultrasound to find that yes, Virginia, that was my period. My lining is only 3 mm so there's nothing left to 'wait for.' Which means I really have no idea what cycle day this is, no idea whether starting the Vivelle patches is going to work because normally you start those on CD1 or CD2...clearly that's not today.
I'm waiting on another phone call from my nurse but she said her gut feeling is that we'll just push forward with starting the patches and see what develops. I don't know if it's too late, I just don't know anymore.
It was all because of their scheduling issues. The whole reason I had to buy a $350 med that ended up causing more problems than anything, the whole reason I might be canceled, the whole reason those biopsies might be in vain. Yes, I know I'm getting ahead of myself but still. Their stupid scheduling! I cannot think about this any longer, because it makes me so mad.
We were visiting my Dad this weekend. Mr. LastChance took his acoustic guitar so we could sing together. I know, right? But my Dad loves to sing and at this point I'll do anything to make him happy.
We sang "Will the Circle Be Unbroken."
After we had to leave for the weekend he called me, sobbing, saying he doesn't want the circle to be broken.
Me either Dad.
My heart breaks for him. It breaks for me. It breaks for all of the wonderful women I know who are struggling to complete their own circle.
Can't we all just get a little break?
EDIT TO UPDATE: Yes, they called and said slap on a patch. Get a lining check and labwork this Friday, after only five-ish days...so maybe we'll be able to see if the lining is starting to do its thing and also if the lab values indicate we can suppress ovulation. The nurse seemed optimistic...I remain guarded.
2 years ago