A vent.

You know, I've been trying to be cheerful in my last posts. And it's not fake, I have been more cheerful in my real life, not just in the blogworld.

So why, why, why, why did my last patient annoy me so much?

Oh wait. I'll tell you why.

Because she's 40. And just had her third baby. And she has complicated type 1 diabetes which makes pregnancy dangerous and difficult. And she brought one of her little hellions with her to the appointment, and he rocketed all around my office the whole time being disrespectful.

He grabbed on to my tiny Curious George doll--given to me during the middle of IVF #2 by a dear coworker who was one of the only ones who ever asked how things were going so it is special to me--and drooled on it. And this kid is around 4-5 so he shouldn't be chewing on my stuffed animals (I deliberately move it if there is a toddler around as they can't help but want my Curious George doll, he's so adorable!).

And I remained patient and focused on the patient, trying to make small talk with the little boy to keep him occupied as well.

I needed to start on her statin therapy and so I had to utter the words: "But you cannot conceive while on this medication."

Her response: "Oh puleeze. I have three. I am so done it's not even funny!"

Of course you are.

On the way out, her: "Do you have kids?"

"No," I said boldly. "I had five failed in vitro cycles though."

To her credit she said "My God, I'm so sorry" and looked appropriately sad for me.

And then...wait for it...

"Maybe if you adopt you'll get pregnant."

And she's a nurse practitioner for God's sake.

Then her little boy slammed my office door so hard my diploma nearly fell off the wall.

Good. I wanted to slam it myself.

PS To those of you reading this who have children....please do not take them to your doctor appointments. I realize this is a huge inconvenience for you but it is really one of the things we all (all of us doctors and other providers) consistently complain about...people dragging their kids in for important medical visits and then they're half-focused on things and the kids are bored and irritable and so if you do it, just know we're going to talk about you in the lunchroom. Unless your kids are well behaved angels.

PPS You guys are really making too much about our sad little volunteer work. It just helps me keep perspective.

PPSS And speaking of perspective, I went sky diving ten years ago and am DYING to go again. Only Mr. LC doesn't want to go again. I think my friends with kids would say no to that because of the risk, but I don't want to go alone. Anyone coming my way want to go with me?